Every morning this week, I’ve woken in a panic.
Despite the fact I live in the mountains of Wyoming, and look out my window every morning to see a deep blue sky and deer grazing on a hillside of pine trees, I just lay there doom looping.
Maybe you have the same problem/habit. I hope this post will help.
How to stop a doom spiral in three steps.
Step One - Know you’re normal. There’s a lot to panic over.
Indeed, you can be forgiven by feeling swamped by doom, fear, scarcity or sadness, there’s a lot of it in the world right now, but remember this: While there is reason to feel this way, there’s no excuse to collapse under it.
I don’t know if it’s the comparative ease we enjoy today (compared to say, the dark ages, I mean) that makes us think suffering and struggle are an aberration. For most of human history suffering has been a pretty steady feature, that’s why reading history and perhaps getting the Stoics in your inbox can help with some perspective on your troubles.
Wisely, the Stoics remind us to focus on what we can control and not to suffer imaginary troubles. That’s a very good place to start, but what if your brain still won’t chill out and cooperate?
Step Two - Notice where you’re complicit.
How many times a day are you gorging at the doom buffet? Downing four pieces of chocolate-poop pie courtesy of Twitter, bingeing rage sliders from your “news show” of choice, cramming a pile of marshmallow nonsense from TikTok and washing it down with some fizzy green Instagram.
The 24-hour news cycle is designed to deliver outrage and sanctimony, which converts into advertising revenue. Social media is designed to deliver dopamine, which converts into advertising revenue.
Like any addictive substance the more you do it, the more you have to do it just to feel normal. That’s why scrolling feels like a shameful habit. None of us want to admit how much we do it because we know it’s hurting us and we don’t stop.
But here’s the real trap door: In order to get the dope, we’ve got to consume a bunch of rat poison too - the slander, the fear-mongering, the racism, sexism, ageism, the violence….
That, more than anything, fuels the screaming doom loops in our brains, and there is no way you can out-meditate a brain soaked with rat-poison.
This is why the dumb-phone movement is gaining speed. I know if my phone is handy when I’m bored, I’m going to scroll. Even though I know it kills my peace, I’m addicted to it.
So what am I going to do about that? Dumb-phones are an option. Here’s another.
Step Three - Ground, Pray, Connect.
Just like an addict can’t usually mindset their way out of cigarette, alcohol or heroin addiction, I need help out of the social media addiction that fuels my morning doom spiral.
And I may have to get radically low-tech about it.
For hundreds of thousand of years, humans walked everywhere, and they usually did it together for safety. I couldn’t find anybody to walk with this morning, except Wally, then I remembered Jesus is always up for a walk and chat.
(Sadly, and I despise having to say this, the Jesus I’m talking about is the Jesus of the gospels. The one who said his followers would be known for their love for one another, the one who commanded us to care for the poor, the widow, the immigrant and the orphan, the one who flipped tables in defense of poor people and holiness, the one who was beaten and crucified by religious and political power brokers. I make the distinction because people are shouting with increasing volume and fealty to a Jesus I do not recognize.)
Anyway.
As Wally and I hiked up a steep trail in our shady pine forest, I laid out for Jesus the finer details of my doom spiral, and it’s funny how many sentences started with the word I.
Almost like my own self-obsession was part of the problem. Hmmm. Maybe I should think about that.
As a result of a pretty serious injury I suffered a few weeks ago, I decided to rest a minute and found a nice big shade tree in an open meadow on a hill.
Then, lying down seemed like a good idea: You know grounding - trading some electrical energy with the earth? As I laid back, I felt a rock right behind where I was (gently) laying my head. I thought the Prophet Elijah laid down with his head on a rock and rested, (or maybe it was Jacob) and when Elijah woke there was bread and water there for him.
I laid there and kept talking to Jesus who said he is the bread of life anyway and after a few minutes, I wasn’t spiraling anymore at all.
Body on the ground. Mind off myself. No phone in sight. Sweet.
What silence says.
With my back in the grass, I felt my beloved Lord say gently, “this is how it is when you’re with me. Resting. Letting your worries absorb into the ground. Handing over to me what’s happening so I can handle it for you.”
Suddenly, I was able to talk to him about OTHERS, praying for a wedding that’s happening later today on the ranch. Praying for safety for all our riders today. Praying for my friend who recently lost his wife to cancer. Praying for a client who got a breast cancer diagnosis last month.
Some time later, Wally and I got up with no doom in sight. I felt a renewed commitment to put myself in the position where Jesus can reach me and help me recenter.
But let’s be clear, he absolutely won’t compete with anything I choose instead of him - including but not limited to TikTok. Lord have mercy that sounds so stupid when I say it out loud.
So maybe today, give yourself a break for feeling crazy, but take responsibility for it too, and do what needs doing to center yourself.
Laying in the grass for a few minutes and saying thank you for all the good in your life might be a great start.
ps. Did you know we’re hosting a women’s conference, on the beach, this fall, in Pensacola, Florida. Oct 25-28th. It’s going to be beautiful all the way around. We’d love for you to join us. Find all the info here.